Suddenly a Caregiver - eBook Available Now

I am pleased to announce the release of Suddenly a Caregiver as an eBook on Smashwords.

Promotional price: $6.74

Coupon Code: YC69H

Expires: March 23, 2013

Sharing a family’s experience and lessons learned to help you through the unexpected responsibility of becoming a family caregiver. The lessons learned include advocacy, caregiver concerns, organizational helpers, grieving, and a variety of other topics while caring for my wife who was diagnosed with glioblastoma multiforme – a stage 4 brain cancer.

Book Page - http://darrylpendergrass.com/books/suddencaregiver/

Facebook Book Page - http://www.facebook.com/SuddenlyACaregiver

This eBook is available in all popular formats

Book in Progess

Suddenly a Caregiver

A guide to help you you through the unexpected responsibility of becoming a family caregiver.

At the urging of friends and family, I started working on a book about caring for someone diagnosed with gliobastoma multiforme (GBM) - a stage 4 brain cancer. Glioblastoma effects slightly over 10,000 Americans per year (CBTRUS, 2012).

I want to share the story of one person's courage in her fight against this disease and the lessons that I learned along the way. My hope is that our story will be a source of encouragement and strength for you if you find yourself Suddenly a Caregiver.

For updates on the progress and release, please visit my web site.

http://www.darrylpendergrass.com/books/suddencaregiver/default.htm

9 Nov 2010 - Memorial and Tributes

Lynne's memorial and celebration of her life is scheduled for 7:00 pm this evening. I hope to see you there.

Sun Valley Church of Christ
1015 N Recker Rd
Gilbert, AZ 85234
Google Map

In lieu of flowers, Lynne and the family request donations to:
Barrow Neurological Institute
http://www.supportbarrow.org/Memorials_And_Tributes/190721

Regards,
Darryl

6 Nov 2010

Lynne won her battle against the Glioblastoma Multiforme at 2:05 pm this afternoon. At noon, her breathing became extremely labored and the oxygen saturation dropped to 55%, so we were sure that she was within just a few minutes. But Lynne is a fighter - a fighter to the bitter end.


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5 Nov 2010

I decided to spent the night at the hospice house tonight. As the signs of Lynne's impending passing increase, I am reluctant or incapable of resting. The children and I were able to spend some quality time with Lynne this afternoon. I believe she heard our words because she provides some simple acknowledgements. I did notice that she is struggling to focus her vision to those that are speaking but I am consoled that she acknowledges in other ways.

Today, I made my way to a local funeral home to plan for Lynne's final desires. Lynne wants to donate her body for study and research, especially her brain to further the body of knowledge for combating Glioblastoma Multiforme. She mentioned in the past her desire to contribute to the education of future doctors and possibly to extend the life of someone else. Her caring spirit continues to amaze me. I appreciate her courage and hope to build enough courage myself to make a similar decision.

As I prepare to retire for the evening, I pass along a simple reminder - hug the ones you care about and tell them you love them. May God bless you all.

Regards,
Darryl


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3 Nov 2010

Over the last two days, Lynne has enjoyed some additional energy. Yesterday, Diana lit up Lynne's eyes at the suggestion of a carmel frappe from McDonalds - one of Lynne's favorite indulgences. At one point, Diana tried to remove the cup from Lynne's hand to warm the hands a bit but Lynne gave her the "stink eye." In other word, "Get your hands off my frappé."

The hospice staff moved Lynne outside for a bit this morning to enjoy a little fresh air and the warm sun. She enjoyed the cool air and the sound of the humming birds at a feeder nearby.

She is enjoying the visits from family and the many friends she has made over the years. She is especially attuned to the voices and seems to recognize many by voice before sight. Despite her condition, she has not lost her caring ways. Each hug is accompanied but the gentle pats on the back. On Monday, I was outside her room reading some cards sent to her. Some of the cards elicited some tears and she heard me, calling me into the room she wrapped her left arm around my back and began her comforting patting. Even in her condition, she musters the strength to console and comfort others.

Regards,
Darryl

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31 Oct 2010

Except for brief moments of consciousness, Lynne has been sleeping since Friday evening. She is not eating or drinking. All medications are suspended except for one to control seizures, one to prevent nausea, and one to manage pain. She is also not receiving anything intravenously. I am thankful that Lynne and I discussed this a couple of years ago. Based on our conversations, I am comforted knowing that decisions I make are those she would make.

If you do not having a living will, do your family a favor and get one created. Lynne and I created them a while back and now I understand the importance of that simple document. Don't think that it can't or won't happen to you because none of us are smart enough or in enough control to know that for sure.

Lynne is resting peacefully. The hospice nurses are very attentive to her needs and providing very good care.

Regards,
Darryl


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30 Oct 2010

Lynne returned to the ER yesterday afternoon following a precipitous decline in her condition. I arrived home from Chicago on an early flight, not yet knowing the news. I received a hearty hug from her and that loving gaze I am very familiar seeing. Not long after, she entered a deep sleep that continues as of this posting. I decided to move her to Banner Gardens Hospice House, where she moved last evening. I believe we are in the last days of Lynne's wonderful life. She has touched the lives of many people and for that I am very grateful.


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22 Oct 2010 Update

The day we always hoped would be tomorrow came today. Lynne's MRI shows extensive tumor enhancement. No conventional treatments remain, so we move toward keeping Lynne comfortable and ensuring that each day is filled with as much peace and joy as possible. Lynne and I have shared many discussions throughout this journey to prepare ourselves for this day. The discussions help to ease this transition but only slightly. Please pray for an inner peace for Lynne and comfort and strength for her family and others that love and care for her.

Regards,
Darryl


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22 Oct 2010

Lynne and I met with the oncologist on Monday and received the recommendation to await another round of lab results before making any decisions about a course of action to address the low platelets. He reassured us that the chemo affects nearly everyone in a similar fashion. Lynne's latest blood results from yesterday indicate stability and slight improvement.

On Wednesday evening, Lynne experienced seizures with enough significance to earn a call to 911. Lynne was taken to a local hospital by ambulance. The initial CT scan showed no abnormalities and blood test results were stable. Lynne was admitted for further testing. Lynne had an MRI and we are awaiting results. There is some question about the quality of the MRI due to Lynne's anxiety with the MRI machine and the lack of appropriate medication to calm her nerves. If the quality is not good enough for a reading, another MRI may be conducted.

The doctors increased her steroid, which seems to have eliminated further seizures and is improving her speech. My hope is that edema is to blame rather than tumor enhancement as we are running out of options to address tumor growth. During the process of admitting Lynne to the hospital, Lynne experience a seizure in her left arm. That is a brand new symptom. This could indicate that the tumor is spreading to the right hemisphere or simply a factor of edema. Only the results of the MRI will shed enough light to understand the cause. My prayer is for edema as that can be controlled easily compared to tumor enhancement. Please join me in that prayer.

May God bless each of you.

Darryl


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16 Oct 2010

Over the last three weeks, two of Lynne's blood levels are trending to critical levels. Her white count is low, so we are taking precautions by avoiding crowds. Even more critical is her platelet level. Three years ago the platelet level reached levels where doctors were concerned about hemorrhaging, necessitating blood and platelet transfusions. We will meet with the oncologist on Monday to discuss further. Her next chemotherapy treatment was set for Monday as well but I suspect she will not have that treatment to prevent further degradation of the platelet level. She is more lethargic than normal, which affects her speech and ability to ambulate. Lynne is concerned and would appreciate your prayers.

Regard,
Darryl


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7 Oct 2010

David M. Bailey recently lost his battle against brain cancer but left a legacy in his music. The following link opens an American Brain Tumor Association page that highlights his story and one of his songs “Share Hope.” I hope you enjoy reading and listening as much as I did.

http://www.abta.org/items_of_interest/In_Loving_Memory:_David_M._Bailey_1966-2010/421-2

Regards,
Darryl

11 Sep 2010

Joyce, our friend from Connecticut, was able to make a trip for a 10-day visit at our home. Her stay was a blessing and a huge help. Besides enjoying her presence, Jessica and I are thankful for the extra set of hands. It's always fun listening to all of the laughs that Joyce and Lynne share when they are together. Netflix will enjoy a new customer, as Lynne got Joyce hooked on McLeod's Daughters, an Australian television series that aired from 2001 to 2009. Joyce has a bit of catching up to do as Lynne was in the middle of year three. Joyce flies back home this morning.




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9 Sep 2010

We had to make a run to urgent care this afternoon. When Lynne was getting ready this morning, she stood up and we heard a pop in her foot or ankle. After a few moments, she did not appear to be in any pain so we applied ice for most of the day. When the physical therapist arrived this afternoon, he recommended an x-ray as a precautionary measure. Luckily, no serious damage occurred, but she has a sprain that we will treat.

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7 Sep 2010

Lynne and I celebrate 31 years of marriage today. We had a fun day reminiscing about our life together. I treated her to a Swiss steak dinner with mashed potatoes. She requested a date to local Mexican restaurant, but we will do that on Friday, as she has several therapy treatments today.

She did pause at one point in the day and wanted to propose. Of course, I said "yes."



Regards,
Darryl

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3 Sep 2010

Lynne is resuming her chemotherapy treatments today following her brain surgery on 14 Jul 2010. The chemotherapy agent is changing to BCNU (bis-chloronitrosourea). Lynne has been feeling a little lethargic for the last several days so I called the doctor yesterday to order some blood work to see if any was amiss and to ensure that her body was ready for this dose of chemotherapy. The results indicate her blood levels are in good shape.

Lynne has not had any of her regular labs since before her last surgery. Lynne and one of the lab managers have become quite close over the last three years, since Lynne has blood drawn every week or so. When we arrived, I saw some tears flow as she was concerned about what had happened to Lynne because we had not been in the lab for nearly three months. Lynne touches lives no matter where her journey takes her. Her home nurse said yesterday "to know Lynne is to love Lynne" and that after only knowing Lynne for three weeks.

Joyce, our friend from Connecticut, arrived Wednesday just in time for Jessica's departure to Las Vegas for a little R&R and a birthday celebration. It's always enjoyable to see what a good time that Lynne and Joyce have while together. I also appreciate the help more than words can express.

My 25 years as a Motorola employee is nearing it's end. Nokia-Siemens Networks announced the purchase of the Motorola Networks business in July. The regulatory approvals are underway. I expect the acquisition to prove beneficial for both companies. I am already busy trying to understand what the acquisition means in terms of the information systems. No small task given the size of the corporations. Such events always provide the opportunity to learn new skills and acquire knowledge. I enjoy learning, so I look forward to the challenge.

Last Sunday, the seven year old Samsung DLP made an awful noise and switched from a high-def color television to a high-def black and white. Jessica wondered aloud how deprived her parents must have been when black and white was the rage. Unfortunately, the TV also presented a small sync problem that I was concerned could possibly induce seizures for Lynne. (I can justify about anything that I really want.) I took a trip to Best Buy the following day and looked at the Samsung 3D systems. Since they did not provide drool cups with the purchase, I chose to forego the 3D option for now and ended up down-sizing to a 58" plasma. Since all of the new equipment supports HDMI interfaces, I had to upgrade the audio/visual receiver in the process. I also upgraded my Logitech Harmony remote to the 1100 model, which resembles a gaming console with a color touch screen to control the features for each device in the system. It's great being geek. Lynne, thanks for the 31-years anniversary present.

I hope you all have a wonderful weekend.
Darryl


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28 Aug 2010

Lynne continues with a busy schedule as she recovers from the aggressive brain surgery six weeks ago. The recovery is slow but progress is being made. The physical and occupational therapy is becoming more strenuous so she is very sore after the sessions. She was scheduled for an occupational therapy session today but I had to cancel because she could barely get her eyes open when I tried to awaken her. She did manage to get up for lunch but wanted to rest about two hours later and she is still sleeping - four hours so far.

Our air conditioning went out Tuesday evening. I became aware of the problem just shortly after a call from a solicitor offering service for the same. I told them I had someone who takes care of the systems and hung up. Not ten minutes later Jessica walks into the front room and said "why is it so hot in here?" I told her I guess it's time to call that someone who takes care of the systems. Luckily, the house has two units so we slept in the guest room.

Kirk, from Croffoot Heating and Air Conditioning, called at 6:30 the next morning stating he was on his way to take a look at the malfunctioning unit. After a brief description of the situation, he believed the motor starter capacitor was bad. He opened the unit and discovered a bad ________; you guessed it - motor starter capacitor. In nothing flat, we regained a reprieve from the Arizona summer.

Lynne and I met with her oncologist this week. The office is seeking approval from the insurance company, so we expect a call within a couple of business days to schedule an appointment for Lynne's continued chemotherapy. The BCNU is administered intravenously in two separate doses, once for two consecutive days then repeated every six weeks. According to my research, most people tolerate BCNU fairly well with minimal nausea and other side-effects. I am hoping that Lynne tolerates the BCNU treatment with minimal side-effects, as she demonstrated high sensitively to Temodar, a previous chemotherapy drug. Existing therapies for glioblastoma multiform (GBM) are palliative so we will continue regular MRI scans to monitor the state of the cancer.

As always, Lynne and I appreciate your prayers, thoughts, and cards. We also appreciate those who have shared meals with us and supplied Lynne with the McDonald's Carmel Fraps and other treats over the last few weeks.

Regards,
Darryl

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20 Aug 2010

Lynne's recovery from her surgery is moving along steadily. She had nine appointments this week with doctors, therapists, and home nurse visits. She is definitely ready for a nap after the therapy appointments. Lynne has moments of clear speech but still struggles to find the words to express her thoughts.

Yesterday, without warning, the batteries for the Logitech universal entertainment system remote died so I had to make an emergency run for AAA batteries. This is only an emergency when one is stuck on the couch most of the day. As I made my way to the garage, Lynne said "can I ride along?" She had just finished a physical therapy session and was ready so I helped her to the car for a few minutes out of the house. Once into the car, she said "you know I have a plan." She didn't have to say any more, I knew she wanted a McDonald's Carmel Frappe, you know the one that is fantastilicious.

Lynne's sister was able to sit with Lynne for a few hours on Wednesday. Jessica went to the mall for a little breather and I got a little uninterrupted work time. We are also looking forward to a visit from our friend in Connecticut. Lynne will get some time to talk about things other than cancer, doctors, and treatments.

We did meet with neuro-oncologist this week to discuss chemotherapy options. He recommends switching to bis-chloranitratesurea (BCNU) due to Lynne's sensitivity to Temodar. Lynne almost lost her life when taking Temodar three years ago due to platelet counts that plunged to fatal levels. Temodar is a one of the gold-standard treatments, especially following the initial diagnosis. BCNU is one of the original treatments for GBM approved by the FDA in 1977. BCNU is the same agent that is in the Gliadel wafers implanted during surgery. She has an appointment with her oncologist next week to get the chemotherapy treatments started again.

7 Aug 2010

We have had a pretty uneventful week at home since Lynne was discharged from the rehab facility. Lynne has moments where she is able to speak clearly but most of time she finds difficulty piecing together her thoughts into coherent speech. Lynne is sleeping well at night, which is a relief. When I get a good night's sleep, I have much more energy throughout the day. Jessica is also contributing most of her time to ensure that Lynne has a 24 hour watch.

I have been coordinating doctor appointments and her continued rehabilitation therapy care this week. The rehab doctor and I had agreed on home therapy but the discharging physician prescribed out-patient therapy. Her primary care physician supposedly sent an order to a local home therapy company but when I called yesterday, they claimed no knowledge of receipt. We are meeting with the primary care physician on Monday so we will get things rolling. Lynne did mention to me at breakfast that she is ready to get working on the rehabilitation. I am also coordinating the resumption of her chemotherapy treatments. The neuro-oncologist is recommending a modification in her treatment, so I am greasing the communication skids to ensure that her oncologist receives the recommendation and to schedule her first appointment.

Lynne and I met with the neurosurgeon on Thursday. He is pleased with the healing of the surgical site. Given the significant deficiencies resulting from this surgery I asked the surgeon about the likelihood of any future surgical procedures. He confirmed my suspicion. The risk associated with each subsequent surgery increases significantly compared to the previous procedure. Any future procedures must be considered with great care. At this point, we are looking to the chemotherapy as the primary treatment.

Susie and Kristel stopped by on Wednesday and treated Lynne with lunch from Taco Bell. Tom and Charlotte treated us to takeout from Pei Wei last evening. That put the infamous Lynne grin out Lynne's face. We enjoyed both the meal and the visit. Lynne continues to receive several cards each day, which she appreciates very much.

As Lynne's condition stabilizes, I will be posting updates less frequently but will update promptly with any significant news.

Regards,
Darryl


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1 Aug 2010

After a couple of days of searching I located a potential vehicle that will suit Lynne's need for one that is lower to the ground so she can get in and out safely. Given the number of doctor appointments she is scheduled for in the next few weeks, moving quickly is important.

I located a Cadillac CTS-V on a local dealer website on Friday. On Saturday, the vehicle was no longer posted, so I started searching for other suitable alternatives. On Sunday, much to my surprise and delight, the vehicle once again appeared on the website so I showed up at opening time for a test drive. Come to find out, a co-worker of my brother was looking at the same vehicle, luckily I beat him to the punch. On my way out the door, Lynne managed to say "Black." She loves black vehicles with chrome wheels, so I assured her I had her back on this one.

The deal was a good one. I traded in both the 2005 Denali and the 2000 Yukon. The Yukon was driven a whopping 1,200 miles last year. So I am thankful that the deal worked and receive the benefit of not paying insurance and registration.

So back to the CTS-V... the V includes the Corvette LS6 engine and all of the performance tweeks and options one would expect from Cadillac. While I made sure that the vehicle met Lynne's needs, the 405HP and 0-60 in 4.5 seconds is just for me. That is what makes a good marriage right... compromise.

Regards,
Darryl